When we were young adults, my father used to put together these grand family gatherings. Often they were around Christmas because winter was a slower season in his business than summer, but he would go in for a summer event from time to time as well. He would touch base with each of his children and see if we could come. One of his favorite places to get us together was Chico Hot Springs. He would invite cousins and their families and plan adventures such as a winter drive into Yellowstone Park. But the whole point of the event was just to get the gang together. This was in the days before Chico got discovered by lots of people with money from out of state. I remember one December evening when we pulled together a bunch of tables in the dining hall for our family. There was this one huge table attended by most of the waitstaff in the place and then just one other table with four people at it. The ratio of family to others was about the same in the swimming pool as well.

We liked the family get togethers. We enjoyed seeing everybody and it didn’t hurt that we were able to have a nice room in a resort without it costing us any money.

I don’t think I understood my father until now, though. There is somewhere inside of me this deep longing to get my family together. We had our children and our grandson together last summer for a glorious time, so it hasn’t been that long. But this weekend is a real treat for me. Everyone is here. And we have a new granddaughter so there are two in that generation now. Yesterday as we were all getting toward the same location I found myself aching to see our daughter and to have her see her niece and nephew.

We aren’t as big of a splash in a restaurant. Our family is smaller than the bunch of kids and grownups that my dad used to convene. But it felt really grand to sit at the end of a table with our children, their spouses and our grandchildren last night. I think I know what contented is. Some of the family were getting pretty tired. Michael has been working nights and he and Rachel had come from one time zone to the east. Our grandchildren were from one time zone to the west, so they had more energy. Our grandson was pretty excited to see everybody and to be in a new environment.

I was simply happy. It seemed for the moment that i have everything that I want in this life.

Today we will be getting together our family with quite a few of the relatives on Susan’s side as we prepare for the wedding of our niece. On Sunday afternoon, we’ll be introducing our grandchildren to relatives on my side of the family at a birthday party for my sister.

It is a kind of a new thing for me to feel quite this way. For most of my professional life I have wanted to sort of get away from people when I had a little vacation. I would plan a trip to a lonely campsite and just sit and watch the creek flow by. Or I would get up early and take my canoe out by myself. Other family members would be flowing to big family get togethers. And I would come, but it seemed to me that getting together with all of my cousins and aunts and uncles and brothers and sisters was a lot like what I do for a living. There are about the same number of personality differences and potential for hurt feelings in my family as in a mid-sized church. Getting together with my siblings and their families was something that I tolerated.

But getting our family together seems like the best of ideas.

Maybe I like being a patriarch. I’m the old man now. No one cares if I get down on the floor to play with my grandson and even though his parents don’t want to encourage too many splashes in puddles on the way to supper, they are very tolerant of wet pant legs when grandpa has been a part of the splashing.

People smile when I carry my infant granddaughter down the street. They even step aside for us in a narrow crosswalk. My daughter’s smile can light up the room for me and I am amazed at my son’s competent intelligence and ability to solve problems.

I’m pretty sure that the motorcyclists polishing their fancy bikes covered with a lot of added chrome and the old men smoking their cigars and the drivers of the million-dollar RVs and the couples in their fancy convertibles don’t even notice me. But it feels like I’m the luckiest guy in the world when I walk down the street with my family - like I wouldn’t trade places with any of them.

I remember being very happy when we had two small children. I remember being proud of them when we would go out in public. But I also remember being worried about whether or not they were making too much noise, and fretting a bit about how the money would work out and the logistics of getting our family from one point to another. I suppose I was a bit more tired in the evening and a bit more frayed around the edges. These days I spend less time and energy on the worries and more on the joy.

I guess that when I am surrounded by so many beautiful people no one expects me to be good looking. When I am surrounded by so many intelligent people, it is OK for me to be the silly one.

My kids laugh at my dumb jokes a lot more than they did 10 or 20 years ago.

Looking back, every phase of being a father has been very good for me. I have enjoyed that part of my life very much. I liked our children when they were preschoolers and when they were teenagers. Being the dad of adults, however, is also a very wonderful part of life. This particular phase is one of the best.

I don’t mean to brag, but today feels like Thanksgiving.

God is good all the time.
All the time God is good.

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