One
09/02/12 06:29
One year ago today we were waiting, waiting, waiting. We were at home, which is Mountain Time while the events that held our attention were unfolding in the Pacific Time Zone. At 2:20 we got a message that Allison was heading home from work with contractions beginning to get stronger. Just before 4 the message was: “Water broke to St. Peters . . .”
By then we were having trouble keeping our emotions in check. Our anticipation was really, really strong. At 8:59 we got the message we were waiting for. It simply said: “Baby.” Through the wonders of electronic wizardry, there was also a picture on the screen of my cell phone.
And now it is one year later. What a year it has been! Developmental psychologists have long known that he first 18 months of life is a time of incredible growth and learning. An infant comes into the world in an incredibly vulnerable state. The child is dependent upon adults for all of his or her needs. And this world must be a very confusing thing at first sight for a newborn. Bright lights and an array of sounds that must sound like a cacophony surround the tiny one.
But there is also love. Babies are good at inspiring love. And those of us who are fortunate to meet them are clearly susceptible to love at first sight.
With great care and love a name was chosen: Elliot Thomas. A journey was begun. Like many epic journeys, my role will be to travel alongside for a little while. Though I was emotionally engaged and kept apprised of much of the beginning of the journey, I know that it is a journey that will stretch beyond the span of my time on this earth.
The journey of the first year has been incredible! I have been given the honor and privilege of staring into that tiny face as he slept and listening to the emerging giggle when he was awake. I have been amazed at the growth in size and he growth in abilities that have been the first year. It wasn’t my first experience with a baby. I got to be in on the adventure of the first year of his father’s life as well. There is something wonderful about being the grandfather. The rest of the family doesn’t seem to mind a bit of blubbering emotionalism and they don’t expect every idea that a grandfather proposes to be practical. In my experience, caring for a grandchild is accomplished with plenty of backup. The somewhat frightening experience of being alone and in charge that comes with your own children is replaced with a sense that there are plenty of helpful hands close by. When fat grandpa fingers can’t do the button, there is always someone who can make the task look easy. When grandpa’s application of the washcloth is less than thorough there is another gentle hand that cleans behind the ears and scrubs away the dirt grandpa missed. When a fussy baby’s needs are hard to understand, other loving hands will scoop the baby from grandpa and help find what is needed. Grandpa gets to be there for the winks and giggles and coos and smiles. The smiles can melt your heart.
One is a marvelous age as near as I can figure. I can’t remember my own experience of the number. I do know that there is no feeling like having your fingers grasped by those little hands and sensing the tug of one who is leaning into life and heading forward with the biggest steps he can take. I do know that there is no sound like the giggle of a boy discovering the game of tossing something on the floor for grandpa to retrieve. I do know that an old guy who is easily bored and always needs to have a book at hand can be mesmerized by sitting on the floor and tossing a ball back and forth with a child whose capacity for repetition provides the means to learn new things every day.
I guess I must be the most fortunate person in the world. And knowing that other grandfathers get to feel the same way does not diminish my joy in the least.
Elliot will not remember his first birthday. He would be happy and satisfied simply to be surrounded by the people in his life. A few bites of food and a sippy cup of water give him joy. A hug is a wonder. And he is completely entertained by someone who will offer hands to hold so he can walk around and around the room.
But as one who has a grandpa’s memory, it is a real treat to be here for the first birthday. Mom and dad have invested energy in planning a party, with thoughts of guests to invite and food to serve and some fun activities to share. Grandpa will pitch in with the work, but is quick to offer to hold the baby or play with him so others can do other chores. It is light duty for the old guy and he loves every minute of it.
If mom and dad think that grandpa gets a little carried away with presents, grandma understands that the gifts are mostly gifts for grandpa. He enjoyed shopping for the little guy more than he enjoys shopping for anything else. He’s not much of a shopper and isn’t attracted to stores and advertisements, but there is genuine pleasure in finding something that will be a fun toy for a one year old.
I’ve never aspired to be rich or famous, thought I once harbored career goals that were, in retrospect, a bit unrealistic. My ego was a bit over-inflated when I was a young man and I had to learn lessons in humility as I may my way through this life. When I was going through the process of discovering my vocation and establishing my career, I didn’t realize how quickly the days would pass and how soon my priorities would shift. But life has been a good teacher and somehow I keep discovering what is most important. I guess all of that is part of being the most fortunate person in the world.
Happy Birthday Elliot! You’ve got a lot more ahead of you and some will be much more memorable for you than this one. But it is a day your grandpa will never forget and I’m just glad I get to be here to see it.
By then we were having trouble keeping our emotions in check. Our anticipation was really, really strong. At 8:59 we got the message we were waiting for. It simply said: “Baby.” Through the wonders of electronic wizardry, there was also a picture on the screen of my cell phone.
And now it is one year later. What a year it has been! Developmental psychologists have long known that he first 18 months of life is a time of incredible growth and learning. An infant comes into the world in an incredibly vulnerable state. The child is dependent upon adults for all of his or her needs. And this world must be a very confusing thing at first sight for a newborn. Bright lights and an array of sounds that must sound like a cacophony surround the tiny one.
But there is also love. Babies are good at inspiring love. And those of us who are fortunate to meet them are clearly susceptible to love at first sight.
With great care and love a name was chosen: Elliot Thomas. A journey was begun. Like many epic journeys, my role will be to travel alongside for a little while. Though I was emotionally engaged and kept apprised of much of the beginning of the journey, I know that it is a journey that will stretch beyond the span of my time on this earth.
The journey of the first year has been incredible! I have been given the honor and privilege of staring into that tiny face as he slept and listening to the emerging giggle when he was awake. I have been amazed at the growth in size and he growth in abilities that have been the first year. It wasn’t my first experience with a baby. I got to be in on the adventure of the first year of his father’s life as well. There is something wonderful about being the grandfather. The rest of the family doesn’t seem to mind a bit of blubbering emotionalism and they don’t expect every idea that a grandfather proposes to be practical. In my experience, caring for a grandchild is accomplished with plenty of backup. The somewhat frightening experience of being alone and in charge that comes with your own children is replaced with a sense that there are plenty of helpful hands close by. When fat grandpa fingers can’t do the button, there is always someone who can make the task look easy. When grandpa’s application of the washcloth is less than thorough there is another gentle hand that cleans behind the ears and scrubs away the dirt grandpa missed. When a fussy baby’s needs are hard to understand, other loving hands will scoop the baby from grandpa and help find what is needed. Grandpa gets to be there for the winks and giggles and coos and smiles. The smiles can melt your heart.
One is a marvelous age as near as I can figure. I can’t remember my own experience of the number. I do know that there is no feeling like having your fingers grasped by those little hands and sensing the tug of one who is leaning into life and heading forward with the biggest steps he can take. I do know that there is no sound like the giggle of a boy discovering the game of tossing something on the floor for grandpa to retrieve. I do know that an old guy who is easily bored and always needs to have a book at hand can be mesmerized by sitting on the floor and tossing a ball back and forth with a child whose capacity for repetition provides the means to learn new things every day.
I guess I must be the most fortunate person in the world. And knowing that other grandfathers get to feel the same way does not diminish my joy in the least.
Elliot will not remember his first birthday. He would be happy and satisfied simply to be surrounded by the people in his life. A few bites of food and a sippy cup of water give him joy. A hug is a wonder. And he is completely entertained by someone who will offer hands to hold so he can walk around and around the room.
But as one who has a grandpa’s memory, it is a real treat to be here for the first birthday. Mom and dad have invested energy in planning a party, with thoughts of guests to invite and food to serve and some fun activities to share. Grandpa will pitch in with the work, but is quick to offer to hold the baby or play with him so others can do other chores. It is light duty for the old guy and he loves every minute of it.
If mom and dad think that grandpa gets a little carried away with presents, grandma understands that the gifts are mostly gifts for grandpa. He enjoyed shopping for the little guy more than he enjoys shopping for anything else. He’s not much of a shopper and isn’t attracted to stores and advertisements, but there is genuine pleasure in finding something that will be a fun toy for a one year old.
I’ve never aspired to be rich or famous, thought I once harbored career goals that were, in retrospect, a bit unrealistic. My ego was a bit over-inflated when I was a young man and I had to learn lessons in humility as I may my way through this life. When I was going through the process of discovering my vocation and establishing my career, I didn’t realize how quickly the days would pass and how soon my priorities would shift. But life has been a good teacher and somehow I keep discovering what is most important. I guess all of that is part of being the most fortunate person in the world.
Happy Birthday Elliot! You’ve got a lot more ahead of you and some will be much more memorable for you than this one. But it is a day your grandpa will never forget and I’m just glad I get to be here to see it.