On Divorce
07/10/12 05:21
My sermon today will be shorter than this blog. In a busy congregation with a lot of activities, there are many voices that need to be heard. Today is a special mission festival, with opportunities for members of the congregation to learn more about a large number of outreach ministries in which we engage as a congregation. We have guest speakers who will highlight a couple of those mission projects. And it is worldwide communion Sunday. There is a lot going on and the sermon will not be the main focus of our worship today.
There is much about a Sunday like today that is good. Words are not the only way to show respect and reverence for God. Words are not necessarily the best way to worship. In the hectic rush of our world, silence is often a better approach to worship than speaking.
The gospel text for today, however, is very challenging. There is quite a bit that could be said about it. In the gospels, Jesus doesn’t use harsh words very often. Today’s reading from the 10th chapter of Mark contains some pretty strong language. I suspect that there are more than a few preachers who be tempted to shy away from the gospel reading and reflect on Job and why the good suffer – an easier topic for the contemporary church than divorce. In the passage, Mark 10:2-16, Jesus clearly speaks against divorce and remarriage. Our congregation, like many others has many people who have experienced a divorce and a remarriage. We are fearful of offending good and faithful people who are a part of our community. It is a bit of a dilemma.
A look at the context of the passage is always good when exploring the text. Jesus and his disciples are on the road to Jerusalem. Crowds gather. Religious leaders try to set Jesus up with a trick question. It is important to note that controversy over divorce and remarriage is not something we invented in our generation. People have been wondering about it and arguing about it since long before Jesus. The fact that divorce is a subject that needed to be addressed by Deuteronomy demonstrates that it has been an issue for millennia. So the question is a good trick question to pose to anyone who is in the public eye. There is no “good” answer. However Jesus answers the question he risks offending part of his audience. It is a little like the dilemma before a contemporary preacher who addresses this text. It is easy to offend someone.
Jesus begins his answer by reviewing the law. The questioners quote Deuteronomy. These days, when we read Deuteronomy we are struck by the rigidly patriarchic culture of the time. The law doesn’t address women at all. It speaks of divorce as the province of men without any consideration for the women and children involved. So Jesus, when confronted by the Pharisees, changes the subject from divorce to marriage. He quotes Genesis and points them to God’s intention for two people to be faithful, lifelong companions in an intimate, committed relationship that should not be severed.
But there is a private conversation that follows. The talk about “adultery” doesn’t come in the conversation with the Pharisees, but only later, when they are in the house. “In the house,” is the way that the writer of Mark records the conversations that were going on within the early church. Jesus then speaks of something that is not addressed in Deuteronomy: a wife divorcing a husband. In this conversation within the early church, the focus shifts from the moment of divorce to the reality of a society like ours. When a society permits divorce and remarriage, as our society does, we need to come to terms with the fact that the bond of marriage is not always easily or completely broken. There are plenty of legal arrangements that put a date to the end of a marriage, but feelings and connections remain. And when we take the children seriously, we understand that some forms of on-going relationship are necessary.
In the contemporary church, we need to acknowledge not only the reality of divorce, but also the pain and on-going struggles that accompany a divorce. Our response needs to be one of compassion and a call for justice. All of those affected by divorce need to be given a voice and whatever laws or conventions we adopt must consider the wider ramifications of divorce. In our congregation we often see the effects of divorce on parents and grandparents of those whose marriages end in divorce.
At the same time the church needs, like Jesus, to shift the focus. There is something essentially good in marriage. Despite the dismal statistics about divorce in our contemporary society, marriage is a good thing – a positive relationship. Marriage is one of the places where we have an opportunity to encounter God. The experience of marriage is an experience of God’s grace. Taking marriage seriously in the church means upholding the sanctity of the relationship and the depth of commitment “for as long as we both shall live.” It also means that the church should hesitate and think very seriously before denying anyone this means of encountering God. Withholding marriage is as serious as denigrating it.
Then, in that “in the house” conversation, Jesus changes the subject once again. The famous passage about welcoming children follows right after the harsh words about divorce and adultery. Maybe the scene was chaotic. Maybe the disciples were tired and in a bad mood. Who knows why they spoke sternly to the children or their parents. Whatever the context, Jesus once again reminds the first disciples and us as well that children are not excluded from God’s gift of grace. He asserts the basic equality of all ages before God, something that it not evident in the harsh legal code of Deuteronomy.
How often I have felt that the courts forget the children when they contemplate the breakup of a relationship. How often I have believed that the courts are the wrong place to handle family disputes. As is often the case, Jesus speaks directly to our generation as clearly as he did to his first followers. We do well to continue to wrestle with the texts as we discover new meanings for our lives.
There is much about a Sunday like today that is good. Words are not the only way to show respect and reverence for God. Words are not necessarily the best way to worship. In the hectic rush of our world, silence is often a better approach to worship than speaking.
The gospel text for today, however, is very challenging. There is quite a bit that could be said about it. In the gospels, Jesus doesn’t use harsh words very often. Today’s reading from the 10th chapter of Mark contains some pretty strong language. I suspect that there are more than a few preachers who be tempted to shy away from the gospel reading and reflect on Job and why the good suffer – an easier topic for the contemporary church than divorce. In the passage, Mark 10:2-16, Jesus clearly speaks against divorce and remarriage. Our congregation, like many others has many people who have experienced a divorce and a remarriage. We are fearful of offending good and faithful people who are a part of our community. It is a bit of a dilemma.
A look at the context of the passage is always good when exploring the text. Jesus and his disciples are on the road to Jerusalem. Crowds gather. Religious leaders try to set Jesus up with a trick question. It is important to note that controversy over divorce and remarriage is not something we invented in our generation. People have been wondering about it and arguing about it since long before Jesus. The fact that divorce is a subject that needed to be addressed by Deuteronomy demonstrates that it has been an issue for millennia. So the question is a good trick question to pose to anyone who is in the public eye. There is no “good” answer. However Jesus answers the question he risks offending part of his audience. It is a little like the dilemma before a contemporary preacher who addresses this text. It is easy to offend someone.
Jesus begins his answer by reviewing the law. The questioners quote Deuteronomy. These days, when we read Deuteronomy we are struck by the rigidly patriarchic culture of the time. The law doesn’t address women at all. It speaks of divorce as the province of men without any consideration for the women and children involved. So Jesus, when confronted by the Pharisees, changes the subject from divorce to marriage. He quotes Genesis and points them to God’s intention for two people to be faithful, lifelong companions in an intimate, committed relationship that should not be severed.
But there is a private conversation that follows. The talk about “adultery” doesn’t come in the conversation with the Pharisees, but only later, when they are in the house. “In the house,” is the way that the writer of Mark records the conversations that were going on within the early church. Jesus then speaks of something that is not addressed in Deuteronomy: a wife divorcing a husband. In this conversation within the early church, the focus shifts from the moment of divorce to the reality of a society like ours. When a society permits divorce and remarriage, as our society does, we need to come to terms with the fact that the bond of marriage is not always easily or completely broken. There are plenty of legal arrangements that put a date to the end of a marriage, but feelings and connections remain. And when we take the children seriously, we understand that some forms of on-going relationship are necessary.
In the contemporary church, we need to acknowledge not only the reality of divorce, but also the pain and on-going struggles that accompany a divorce. Our response needs to be one of compassion and a call for justice. All of those affected by divorce need to be given a voice and whatever laws or conventions we adopt must consider the wider ramifications of divorce. In our congregation we often see the effects of divorce on parents and grandparents of those whose marriages end in divorce.
At the same time the church needs, like Jesus, to shift the focus. There is something essentially good in marriage. Despite the dismal statistics about divorce in our contemporary society, marriage is a good thing – a positive relationship. Marriage is one of the places where we have an opportunity to encounter God. The experience of marriage is an experience of God’s grace. Taking marriage seriously in the church means upholding the sanctity of the relationship and the depth of commitment “for as long as we both shall live.” It also means that the church should hesitate and think very seriously before denying anyone this means of encountering God. Withholding marriage is as serious as denigrating it.
Then, in that “in the house” conversation, Jesus changes the subject once again. The famous passage about welcoming children follows right after the harsh words about divorce and adultery. Maybe the scene was chaotic. Maybe the disciples were tired and in a bad mood. Who knows why they spoke sternly to the children or their parents. Whatever the context, Jesus once again reminds the first disciples and us as well that children are not excluded from God’s gift of grace. He asserts the basic equality of all ages before God, something that it not evident in the harsh legal code of Deuteronomy.
How often I have felt that the courts forget the children when they contemplate the breakup of a relationship. How often I have believed that the courts are the wrong place to handle family disputes. As is often the case, Jesus speaks directly to our generation as clearly as he did to his first followers. We do well to continue to wrestle with the texts as we discover new meanings for our lives.