Early in my career as a pastor, I was introduced to a pastor in a neighboring town who had served the same congregation for more than twenty years. At the time I thought, “Wow! That is a very long time!.” My life had been much different to that point. High School was three years. My undergraduate education lasted four years. Then we were in Seminary four years. After serving in our first parish for for years, I began to think about moving. We didn’t actually move until we had served seven years in that parish. By then it was considered to be a long pastorate. Ministers moved all the time. The United Methodist congregation in our town was on its third pastor in the same period of time. All of the churches in our community had seen a change in pastors during the seven years that we served. By the time we left, we had the longest tenure in that town.

That call was followed by a ten years of service to our second call. By that time, the “four year itch” had left me and I no longer was looking to move every few years. I had discovered that there are quite a few things that a pastor is able to do only after having invested enough time to really get to know the dynamics of the congregation and the community.

I also discovered that there is a point in a pastorate where the relationships with the people you serve become very deep. I saw the transition from officiating at funerals for the folks in the church to officiating at funerals for my friends. Most of the funerals were for people I considered to be friends by the end of our time in that parish.

And now, somehow, I find myself attending the graduation parties of youth who weren’t even born when I came to this parish. I officiated at the wedding of the parents and I baptized the children and I have buried the grandparents in some cases. I have been invited into some of the homes of the people of our church so many times on so many different occasions that I no longer need a map to find the address.

The relationship, however, hasn’t been static. A congregation is a living entity. Even when the pastor stays for a long time, the members come and go. We’ve been through divorces and we’ve seen church members move on to other congregations. Some people who used to be active are no longer so. New leadership has emerged. Our community is a place where many people come to retire, so we often gain new members who move to town ready to get involved in a church. The community sees a continual coming and going of people.

May is a season of saying goodbye for a church. Some of our members are moving to new jobs in new places over the summer. Our graduates are heading to colleges and the service. Some will be right in town, others will be a long ways away. The majority of the youth who grow up in our church end up living in other communities. Some will become active and leaders in other congregations. I have had the opportunity to see those leadership skills emerge and I hope that other congregations will be able to recognize their gifts.

There are advantages and disadvantages to long term pastorates. Research has shown that congregations with long term pastorates tend to be healthy. It isn’t clear whether the health is caused by the long term of the pastor or that the long term relationship is made possible by the health of the congregation. Probably it is a combination of both factors. The impact of long term pastorates on the life of churches is so significant that the Lily Endowment has invested millions of dollars in clergy renewal grants that fund sabbaticals and encourage long term stability of leadership for congregations.

It has also been demonstrated, however, that the transition following a long term pastorate is a difficult one for a congregation. Often the next relationship with a pastor isn’t as successful. The congregation becomes used to a particular style of leadership and isn’t quick to adapt to new leaders and different ways of doing business. It isn’t uncommon for a couple of short-term pastorates to follow a long-term one. I’ve thought about those dynamics when I think of the congregation I presently serve. I have been called to serve in the best interests of the church and to do what I believe is best for the whole church, not just what is most comfortable for me. I am aware that I have reached a stage in my life where I am a bit set in my ways and where some changes are more challenging for me. I try very hard to be open to new ways and new possibilities, but I know that I can sometimes have a “we tried that before and it didn’t work” attitude.

So the next couple of weeks will be a time for a bit of nostalgia for me. I look at the pictures assembled for the graduation parties showing the graduate as a baby and a child and all of the adventures of the 18- or 19-year journey that has led to this event. And I can say, “I remember that!” I can remember holding this near-adult when he or she was a baby. I can remember some awkward fifth-grade moments. I was there for the rite of confirmation.

The wonderful thing about graduations, however, is that they are about what is yet to come. The term “commencement” means “beginning.” This is the beginning of something new and important. There is much that is yet to be revealed. The next four years will show us something, but it might take a dozen before the direction of a life is fully evident.

Now that I’ve reached this particular age, I know a dozen years can go by very quickly. It’s OK. I’ve got the time.

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