I don’t think that I was particularly challenged by basic arithmetic when I was a student in elementary school. At least I don’t remember any trauma or worries about the subject from my early years in school. I was, in general, a fairly good student and my parents encouraged learning through the activities of our home. I was in the middle grades when our school adopted what was then called “new math.” Other than a new name for arithmetic, I don’t remember much about new math. I knew that there was something controversial about it - that some parents criticized it and that my dad would defend it in conversations with his peers, but it doesn’t seem to me that it posed much of a change in my life one way or another. I made it through memorizing my times tables and learned long division and became competent in basic computation. In high school, I survived algebra and geometry and then sort of stopped taking classes in math. I managed to pretty much avoid math and science courses in college and graduate school. I use basic math in a lot that I do, figuring percentages and proportions and reading budgets, but I certainly don’t consider myself to be any kind of an expert.

My wife, on the other hand, studied more mathematics than I. She was in a college preparation track in high school and took advanced classes in math each of her high school years. She took calculus in college and god a good grade at it. She is good with numbers and quick to solve the kind of mathematical problems that come up in everyday advice. She can compute fairly complex problems in her head. She does all of our income tax and social security reporting, she is an excellent manager of money and finances, and I’ve always felt that she was just a bit more skilled with numbers than I.

When it comes to boats, however, it seems that I frequently have to explain basic math to her. Being a frugal and reasonable person, she likes to talk about the difference between “wants” and “needs.” I have developed a simple mathematical formula to explain need to her when it comes to boats. The formula is: n+1, with n=the number of boats one currently has. The number of boats one needs is the number you currently have plus one. This is a constant. When we only owned one canoe, we needed two. This led to three, which led to the need for a kayak, several boats later we developed a need for a rowboat. Whitewater canoes and kayaks are different from flat water boats. If a person were to live long enough, it is perfectly reasonable that one would develop a need for a yacht, or even more than one.

I’ve explained this to my wife several times. I am not completely confident that she gets it. She may even hold the basic formula in suspect. Some days I get the impression that she feels that n-1 is the correct formula.

Lest you think she is intolerant or narrow, however, I will simply remind you that she has remained my wife for more than four decades. I’m pretty sure that qualifies one for sainthood in most circles.

Another mathematical principle, when it comes to boats, requires understanding the concept of factors. Boats operate on a factor of two. To put it down clearly, the formula is n x 2. Take any boat that you might find, either a brand-new boat in a showroom or a rather well-used boat on Craig’s list. There will be an advertised price of the boat. You can, assuming you have the money, pay that amount and the boat will become yours. Very good. Boats are wonderful possessions and they create joy in your garage. But they also create a deep urge to head to a lake, river, ocean or other body of water. The cost of actually getting a boat into the water is roughly a factor of two. The cost of paddles, oars, lifejackets, rigging, spray skirts, flotation, bumpers, roof racks and other accessories roughly doubles the cost of the boat before it is put into the water. I’m pretty sure that if I had calculated the cost of roof rack systems into the basic cost of boating, for example, we might have decided that we could not afford even a single boat. Over the years I probably have been identified by the roof rack company as one of their biggest customers. I own most of the accessories they sell.

Then there is clothing. I hate to shop for clothing. Unless I’m looking at boat shoes to keep my feet warm and dry when paddling, or paddling jackets, or dry suits, or other specialized clothing for paddling. I’ve been known to make jokes about spandex-clad bicyclists. I ride my bike wearing jeans and a t-shirt. But when it comes to paddling, I even own a specialized pair of water socks to put into my dry booties at the bottom of my dry pants, which are too warm for summer paddling, so I have special pants and shorts for the warmer seasons.

I’m pretty sure that this factor of two rule is universal because my next door neighbor has a large waterski boat. He started out with two plastic kayaks. That big boat sits on a fancy custom tandem-axle trailer painted to match the boat. He has a bimini for sunny days and a custom canvas cover for the boat when it isn’t in the water. There is a large assortment of water skis, a hugs towable tube for riding, and a host of other accessories which are too numerous to fit into the boat when it is on the trailer. Sometimes they are neatly packed away in their already full garage, but most of the time they are piled on top of the boat sitting outside in the yard.

Some people might be distressed with such a neighbor, but I see him as a great asset when discussing the mathematics of boating with my wife. I’m fairly confident that all of the boats I have ever owned plus all of the boating gear I have ever owned wouldn’t add up to the cost of that boat and its accessories. It is useful to have it visible from our deck as we sit down to a meal whenever the weather allows us to eat outside.

I wrote this. If you want to copy it, please ask for permission. There is a contact me button at the bottom of this page. If you want to share my blog a friend, please direct your friend to my web site.