Among the resurrection stories reported in the Gospel of John is an interesting exchange between Jesus and Peter. The scene is preceded by one in which the disciples are fishing and they see Jesus on shore by a charcoal fire. Jesus invites the disciples to haul in their nets, which are very full and invites them to come and have breakfast. After breakfast, Jesus asks Peter if he loves him. When Peter says, “Yes,” Jesus says, “Feed my lambs.” The question is repeated a second and a third time. It doesn’t take a biblical scholar to recognize that there is a parallel between the three times that Peter denies Jesus on the eve of his crucifixion and the three times Jesus asks Peter about his love after the resurrection.

The concept of feeding Jesus’ sheep has been one of the images of the pastoral ministry from the early days of the church. One of the ways to demonstrate love and affection for Jesus is by providing care for those who follow Jesus. Pastors are charged with care of their congregations a sign of their love.

Having been a pastor for nearly four decades with this image in my mind, it still remains interesting for me, on occasion, to visit the ranch where they actually feed sheep. For a couple of days, I’ve joined in the farm chores, which includes giving bottles to the bum lambs. My visit coincided with the beginning of the process of weaning the sheep from their bottles. For a couple of months they have been receiving two bottles each day. After they got old enough, the bottles have been supplemented with grain and recently they have been turned out into fresh green grass each day to supplement their feeding. The lambs are getting big enough to need more food than that provided by the bottles. During my visit, it was time to decrease from two bottles a day to one. Instead of getting a bottle in the evening, they got their morning bottle as usual, were turned out to pasture during the day and then were given grain in the evening.

By the next morning, they were hungry and eager for their bottles. At that point, they’re ready to follow anyone who walks into their pen, in hopes of finding a bottle. They don’t care that I’m not their usual person. They don’t care who feeds them as long as there is formula in the bottle.

Although metaphors of sheep and feeding sheep abound in the Bible, I don’t really find too much in the behavior of the sheep that is reflected in the behavior of my congregation. The process of feeding actual sheep at the ranch is quite a bit different from my work as a pastor - and a change from my usual.

Even though I was away from the office for two days, there were phone calls. People needed to talk. They were facing major decisions. They have challenges. I missed a couple of calls and returned them later in the day. I did a little bit of my at home work while I was visiting at the ranch. But mostly I just did a few chores, visited with my sisters and headed back home yesterday.

I don’t have any bottles to prepare or wash today. There are no lambs bleating outside of my window. I won’t be opening many gates today. I probably won’t spend much time scraping mud off of my boots. Life is different at the ranch than it is in my regular place of work. In a little while, I’ll sort through the accumulated e-mail and phone messages, prepare for a Bible study, and plan my visits.

Returning to the conversation between Peter and Jesus about feeding sheep, the ending of that story takes an unusual twist, one that is not often the subject of sermons. Jesus says to Peter, “Very truly, I tell you, when you were younger, you used to fasten your own belt and to go wherever you wished. But when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will fasten a belt around you and take you where you do not wish to go.” (He said this to indicate the kind of death by which he would glorify God.) After this he said to him, “Follow me.”

I’m not sure what to make of Jesus’ prediction about Simon Peter. And I don’t know if that prediction was unique to Peter, or a more general commentary about the life of pastors. I suppose that it is a general truth that we all have less freedom of choice when we become old enough to require the care of others.

I have a great deal of freedom about coming and going at this phase of my life. My job has a certain flexibility that allows men to make changes and come and go a little bit. There are weeks, such as the last one, when I get several days away from the office. There are others when I must stay close and work in the office every day. Compared with many other jobs, however, I have a great deal of freedom to come and go as I choose. And I suppose that the time will come when I am no longer able to fit 900 miles of driving, visits with two of my sisters, and a day’s of ranch chores into a two-day break from my duties at the church.

But I have no more idea what it will be like to relinquish my freedom than did Peter when Jesus make this prediction to him. The hint, provided by the gospel writer in the form of the parenthetical phrase about the indication of Peter’s death, doesn’t add much clarity. And, in a manner that is typical for the Gospels, the narrative quickly moves on to a discussion of the unnamed beloved disciple.

So today I’ll be feeding sheep in a different manner than was the case yesterday and I still will not have direct knowledge of the shape of the future. I’m comfortable with living today and trusting God with the future.

It doesn’t appear that I’ll run out of sheep in need of feed.

I wrote this. If you want to copy it, please ask for permission. There is a contact me button at the bottom of this page. If you want to share my blog a friend, please direct your friend to my web site.