There are mentors in my life whom I have never met face to face. Some have inspired me by their writings, others by their actions in the public sphere. One who has touched me primarily through books, articles and blog posts is Parker Palmer. He is the founder of the Center for Courage and Renewal and one of the persons who continues to inspire me. I’ve written about him in my journal several times. He has teamed up with musician Carrie Newcomer to offer a series of online conversations, podcasts and face-to-face retreats that ask the question, “What is the Growing Edge in Your Life?”

The question has me thinking about my own life. I have had a meaningful career and my job continues to pose new challenges and new opportunities as I pursue my ministry in the midst of the people I serve. I know, however, that I stand, to use another of Parker’s phrases, “on the brink of everything.” Aging presents new opportunities and new challenges and the time will come when the leadership of this congregation will need to pass into other hands.

I became aware of a new growing edge yesterday and it took me by surprise. Members of the Department of Stewardship and Budget in our church, in response to declining attendance and contributions, have been working on ideas to promote church growth. Yesterday the congregation launched a new advertising campaign. The ads are beautifully designed and provoke a moment’s thought. We’ve been talking about them for weeks. Yesterday the donations matched the cost of the ads and we went live. I got into my car and drove to a location near one of the electronic billboards to look at the ads, appearing for eight seconds, every four minutes. They are up on seven electronic billboards in key locations around our city and will remain there for three months.

The surprise, for me, was a strange nervous in the gut feeling that I haven’t experienced for a long time. I remember feeling that way as we drove into Chicago for the first time, having made a commitment to attending graduate school there. I felt that way when we closed on the purchase of our first home. I felt that way when our son was born and when we adopted our daughter and when we dropped each of them off for their first day of college. There have been other times as well. I’m not saying that the church launching a few advertisements is the same thing as adopting a child. But it does seem that we are embarking on a big adventure together.

I know very little about advertising. I’ve relied on the expertise of others throughout this whole campaign. Left to my own sensibilities, the church probably wouldn’t be running any advertisements. But it isn’t the ads that make me nervous. It is the commitment to providing a response to the visitors that the ads will generate. I know that not every visitor who walks through the doors of the church will find what they seek. Our congregation averages 2 - 5 visitors each week and some never come back for a second visit. I’ve learned to pray that they find a church home that is meaningful for them and to go on with the task of serving the people who do find a home in our church. But somehow seeing the church on the giant billboards has demonstrated to me the responsibility we have for reaching out into our community.

140 years ago our congregation was the first Christian congregation organized in our community. For a brief period of time, ours was the only show in town, so to speak. The community was small and those who were interested knew where to go and how to find the church. These days there are hundreds of congregations in our community, with lots of different flavors, musical styles, theological perspectives, leadership roles and commitment expectations. We have maintained a unique position among churches, emphasizing the power of the laity and an extravagant welcome. Maintaining that welcome will be an extra responsibility as we increase the number of visitors.

That nervous feeling in my stomach was more than the anticipation of new work and extra challenges. I love challenges and I’m no stranger to work, either. To be honest, I also wonder what will happen and how I will feel if there is no response to the advertisements. What if the people of our community see the ads and think, “so what?” and go on with their lives without responding at all? What if all of that effort and money don’t affect the course of our life together at all?

I suspect that the reality will be neither extreme. We won’t be overwhelmed with visitors and guests and we won’t go on as if nothing had happened. My powers of prediction have never been keen. Theologically, I’m not a big fan of prediction. What I do believe in is providence. That is a big theological word for the concept that God is always looking at the big picture. We belong to something that is much bigger than ourselves. The ads on the billboards and the life of the congregation isn’t just about me. This isn’t primarily about my growing edge, but rather the growth of the community of God. My life is a part of a bigger picture and I can see only part of the vision that God holds for our community and for the world.

Maybe the feeling in the pit of my stomach is a reminder that this isn’t about me. It isn’t about my successes or failures or even my vision of the future. It is about God’s providence. Throughout the history of our people, leaders have been able to see a bit of that providence. They have understood how they are a part of something that is much bigger than themselves. I certainly don’t know everything that God is up to with our congregation, but I’m convinced that God sees a future for our congregation’s service in this community.

My challenge is to look past the advertisements to the people. Surely God is present in the relationships we build.

Copyright (c) 2019 by Ted E. Huffman. I wrote this. If you would like to share it, please direct your friends to my web site. If you'd like permission to copy, please send me an email. Thanks!